Category Archives: OCD

Depression and Other Drugs

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I am not the type of person who shies away from speaking out about my mental health. It is well-known to my blogosphere, family, and friends that I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). And not the cute kind… Not the OCD where I just alphabetize movies or like a clean house; my OCD looks more like… getting mad that the dishwasher is loaded wrong (there is no right or wrong way) or the route someone is taking is the longer route (by maybe a minute, tops). My level of social anxiety is usually well-hidden and only truly noticeable to my inner circle, but lately it has taken a turn for the worse.

I have been having so much trouble lately with my depression. And don’t ask me to explain why I’m depressed. That’s like trying to explain why the ocean is so big. There’s no one-size fits all answer to depression and what brings it on. I’ve gained some weight, work is stressful, and being a newlywed is not for the faint of heart, but none of those are the reason I’m depressed. I just find myself in this hole (my own personal hobbit hole) where I never want to leave my apartment and I cancel all my previous plans due to the anxiety of having to be out and socializing. Even people who I adore and couldn’t imagine my life without, I find a way to shut them out and recede further into myself. It’s hard to admit out loud, but my depression has really gotten out of control.

So, after many a tearful talk with my mom, husband, and best friend Emily, I forced myself to show up. Go to my doctor and discuss options, because as scared as I am of switching up my anxiety medicine, I’m more scared of not ever feeling like myself again. I’m scared there will come a day when I don’t get out of bed.

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I guess I’m bringing this up because I think it’s important. It’s important to be honest about our struggles. It’s important for me to let you all know why I’ve disappeared and why I seem to not find joy in the things that used to make me so happy. I think it’s important for people to know they’re not alone. Depression, anxiety, OCD… These are all things that can affect your everyday life so drastically. And I truly believe that it is okay and good and mature to sit down and say (albeit reluctantly and tearfully) “I need help. I can’t do this alone.”

I am lucky and blessed enough to have an amazing support team. My husband and family have always had my back and I have a group of close girlfriends who understand mental health and know how to make me feel a little less ostracized. That doesn’t mean that I don’t feel alone sometimes, this is a battle within myself… But it’s important to know you have people out there who love you and who understand what you’re going through.

Don’t be scared to ask for help, don’t be scared to reach out to those around you. If you ever feel alone, I’m here and I get it. Write me. Just whatever you do, know you’re wonderful and this too shall pass.

Newest Obsession: Washi Tape

tape green

I’m sure that I’m late in really getting into Washi tape, but have you guys seen these cute tapes? SO MANY PROJECTS are running through my brain!! Just thought I’d share a few cuties!

tape aqua stripetape yellow floraltape birdstape lovetape floral

tape mint heart

I need to start collecting these and dreaming up some crafty uses for them!

Reader Questionnaire

Hello my beautiful, wonderful, loving readers! I know everyone is getting back into the swing of things at work, etc… but I’d really love some feedback on this little blog of mine.

What are some posts that you guys like and would like to see more of? I have the most hits on my outfit posts, so I’ll definitely be adding more of those in the New Year. What else?

Fur-baby posts?
Day in the life posts?
Things I’m lovin’ posts?
DIY posts?

Help meeeeeeeeee help youuuuuuuuu [a la Jerry Maguire]!

I want this blog to be a success! Help a girl out! :)

Five Facts

1. I am an avid DVD collector. Not only do I own a ridiculous amount of dvds [and actually watch a majority of them on a daily basis], but I also own a lot of tv series collections. My tv series include: Friends, Freaks & Geeks [1 season], Sex & the City, That 70’s Show, Big Bang Theory, How I Met Your Mother, etc!

2. I take photos. A lot of photos. It’s like an obsessive need to commemorate each moment in my life… even the silly ones. My friends are constantly being harassed by my Nikon D3100! I think I just love having such a fantastic camera [FINALLY] and being able to take such great photos!

3. I’m flaky. Sometimes I make plans with friends and then the day of I’ll feel too exhausted or too stressed from work, etc… and instead of just sticking with plans, I’ll cancel them so I can go home, get in pjs, and be alone. I can be a bit of a loner sometimes, I think. Sorry, friends… I’m a flake!

4. I am obsessed with animals… pretty much every pet-like animal with the exception of non-owl birds. haha. I’ve always had pets, practically from birth. My family has just always been the type to have a furry creature running/lounging about. This is probably why I have 3 cats & 1 pup. I like the company of my furbabies!

Franklin

Princess Peach
Callisto
Bellatrix

5. I have a mild case of OCD. And no, I’m not just saying that. I have actually been diagnosed with OCD/anxiety. Before I started taking my medication I felt on edge all the time… and I can’t say enough good things about getting help for anxiety disorders. It really has made all the difference! And I’m not ashamed of it at all, I am Flawed and Fabulous.

What about you guys? 5 facts you’d like to share??